I’ve just read over the second pages (proofs) of The Soldier’s Wife.
This can be a traumatic experience. It’s often at this stage (if not earlier) that the writer is convinced the book is utter crap: boring, repetitive, flat, and without a spark of true creativity.
I’ve learnt to recognise those moments. I think of them as the doldrums, when there is no wind in my sails at all. This is when it’s very very helpful to have an editor (and in my case a husband) to say, ‘No, no, Pamela, it’s a terrific book’. This is one of the most important but little regarded duties of an editor (or a writer’s partner).
Every writer I know goes through some moments of self doubt. When it comes relatively late in the process, you know you’re pretty safe; you’re just suffering from reading too many drafts of the same material. Put it aside for a few months and it’ll be fine.
But what about when it comes early? What about when you’re half way through a manuscript and you are suddenly convinced that it’s no good?
My suspicion is that, if it really is sudden, you should ignore it and keep writing. Pretty soon the desire to find out what happens next, and how it happens, will kick in and override the anxiety.
But sometimes it’s not sudden. Sometimes it’s a slow, creeping suspicion. Sometimes you become gradually disenchanted – with your characters, with your world, with your plot. What then?
Well, that depends. If this always happens to you – if you have a pile of unfinished novels in the bottom drawer (or the archived hard drive) then my advice to you is: ignore the anxiety. It’s just fear that you’re not good enough. And you never will be good enough if you don’t finish anything.
If you are thinking to yourself, ‘I can’t let anyone see this’, then don’t. Accept that you are writing solely to improve your craft, or for personal pleasure, and have at it.
But finish it. Don’t get distracted, don’t get afraid, don’t start that shiny new story which is bubbling away. Just keep going.
However, if it’s never happened to you before – if you are a blithe finisher of things – then getting a second opinion might be a good idea at this point. This is why I love writing courses; even if you don’t learn a lot, you are likely to meet people you can workshop with.
The best friend a writer can have is one who will say, ‘This is not good’. And then tell you exactly why. And if one, or two, or more of your beta readers agree that it’s not working, why then it might be time for the bottom drawer. Not everything we write can be good.
But don’t throw it out. Because in five years’ time, you’ll be thinking about needing one more character in your new book, and you’ll suddenly realise that this is where the main character from the unsuccessful novel really belongs. Or you’ll think, ‘The story was not good, but the world was great. I’ll use the world and ditch the people I put in it.’ (Been there, done that.)
Never throw anything away. Because not only can you recycle it, but when you become a famous writer and universities and libraries are competing to receive your papers, they will want everything, especially the stuff you didn’t use, because then they will have stuff about you that nobody else does!
I’m glad to say that I didn’t sail into the doldrums when I read the proofs of The Soldier’s Wife. I hope that’s a good sign!
It’s taken me 30 years to get to a point where I think I’ve written something pretty good… and that’s how I’m feeling about The King Amongst The Shadows at the moment – after each revision, I keep thinking to myself “Wow, this is so much better than anything I’ve ever written…”
I think it’s the 30 years of failed projects and self-doubt that is helping me avoid the doldrums (so far) with TKATS – it’s so much better and further developed than anything I’ve written before, that I can’t find any reasons for self-doubt…
I’m sure that will change at some point (probably when I start submitting) but I’m enjoying my lack of self-doubt at the moment 🙂
Sorry I missed this comment when you first made it, JJ (think I was on a plane to the UK). I’ve seen TKATS emerge gradually and I know it’s improving with every draft. I think you know now what you want to do with it, and that’s the key for this type of book. Looking forward to reading it when you’re ready to submit!
Pamela I listened to Tomy Arthur the other day I have some interesting facts about WW1 as I am a decendant my Mother 95 is still alive my Fathers Father died 1922 when my Dad was born from gas related injuries I have some info that may be of use if you wish my name is Stuart J Hindle 0418 776 730 email@example.com
Stuart, that would be fantastic! I will email you. Thanks so much.